No Real Lows

Hi guys!

First happy new year!!!

So far the new year is treating me really well. I've already self-studied 7 AP's and I'm doing Stats currently! It's so new, so it's gonna take a while. It's easy though. I feel extremely secure and confident about my ACT (which is in 8 days, on February 7th!) and getting into the colleges I want in the UK.

So this will probably be my last full 2013-Italy related post, but I've come to realize something relieving about the interesting time I had there.

Also please excuse the weird whiteness with this text below, I copied this from my Tumblr and edited it to be in context with this blog.

I was looking through my posts on my Tumblr, and I wrote down tons on when i was in Italy because that's when I mainly used it and its so weird to see how many highs and lows I had. and all the lows had to do with school or coming back here. Admittedly when I think of a specific spot where I had a panic attack in Florence (which was a very beautiful main area sadly) it makes me feel weird at first, but when i go back there, I will realize it had nothing to do with the city or it’s people, it was the thought of coming back here, to LA. except for the teachers. But realizing this suddenly has given me peace. Italy treated me so well, and the highs outweighed the lows completely, since none of the many lows i had were about Italy itself. Also I remember tiny little details were in there like my dropping my fries and screaming and getting unusually emotional. It's tiny little things like that that make me laugh, and realized what a weirdly great time I had there. But like I said, none of the lows were about Italy itself now that i think of it, just school and family drama back here. i feel like a weight has been lifted, in a way. I feel better about myself, and better about my time there. I always talk about the positives about my exchange, but there in florence I had the worst panic attack of my life, to the point i could hardly talk to the suicide hotline i called via Skype, and i had a lot of lows because of personal drama with family, it was really bad. but I’d return in a heartbeat, because if it was for no family/school drama, all would have been great. So college will be that 100% time. Admittedly, occasionally when I think of Florence I still think of that really dark day or two I had there. But from what I said above, that weirdness will go away, especially when I go there in the future and realize what a beautiful spot it was, and how it doesn't deserve a bad rep with me. With time. :)